Revenge

I normally try to refrain from talking about specific events or people, but there’s something I really feel the need to talk about. People do bad things for whatever reason; they’re upset about something and they’re lashing out, they’re seeking attention, or sometimes people just get a big kick out of making other people miserable. Whatever the reason is people do bad things to people who don’t deserve it and sometimes you end up being one of those people. It sucks. It really does, but many people are going to come and go throughout your lifetime and not all of those people are going to be good. Sadly, that’s just a fact of life that you kind of have to accept. So what do you do when someone has wronged you? Well, you will probably think the best course of action is to stand up for yourself, plant your feet firmly on the ground and fight back. While that may be good to do in certain situations, most of the time if someone has generally had a negative impact on your life it’s best to just remove that person from your life, let bygones be bygones, and move on. It isn’t and never will be your job to fix someone or make them pay for their past discretions. This is especially true when the issue is personal and your first thought is to make it public for some preventative action to stop this person from doing what they did to you to other people.

I can’t even begin to tell you just how terrible of an idea this is. Not only is the idea of taking revenge bad in and of itself since it’s childish and essentially the exact opposite of what you should be doing to get over someone hurting you, but bringing a personal problem and making it open with the world allows people to come in and involve themselves in an issue that was only meant to be between two people. This just makes it even messier. Since it is public now, I will say she hurt me too. She hurt a lot of people and will probably hurt others in the future. Maybe she won’t. Maybe she’s actually changed and she really means it this time. Honestly, I don’t care. She will do what she wants with her life and friends and she will deal with the rewards and repercussions of her actions. I know you mean only to do this with good intentions (well sort of, good intentions for the people that are not said person), but it is important now to realize that this isn’t some massive conspiracy you’re uncovering. These are the actions of a person who has made mistakes in their life. I can guarantee you I have done absolutely terrible things to some people and I deeply regret it. I’m sure you have too. Everyone has. Things will be okay once you start letting them. Time heals all wounds, like they say, so you just have to move on and eventually you’ll get over this and it will only be a bad memory, over-shrouded by the many new good memories you will make in the future.

Revenge is never the answer and it only hurts people. Sometimes people think that’s what they want. That the pain the other person will feel will be worth the pain they felt, that just knowing they hurt them the way that person hurt them would make them feel better but it never does. It isn’t ever worth it. After the dust settles you just end up with two hurt people.