Moving On

One of the most difficult things in life that we have to do is to move on from something. To end a chapter. Start from the beginning again. And life make us do it over and over, as if doing it just once wasn’t hard enough. Sometimes it can be a good thing, such as getting a new job that pays more and has benefits and is a million times better than that time you spent working at that hell hole of a restaurant. But let’s be honest, 99% of the time it’s a shit deal. A bad breakup or the loss of a friend. And today I wanna talk about getting past that.

Life has its ups and downs, but it always seems the ups last only a few fleeting minutes and the downs stay for an eternity. Personally, I believe the reason for this is we spend too much time thinking about how good things used to be. Our memories only make the pain of not having what we once had even worse. Then the loss of hope starts to set in. You begin to think you’ll never be happy again. There’s nothing ahead, no light at the end of the tunnel. That you’ll just live miserably for however long and then die and cease to exist. So you start looking forward to that end. The darkness at the end of the tunnel, waiting for it to swallow you whole. That’s how you get trapped, with no hope and no reason to think anything will ever change. You feel like you’re in a hole and anything you do to get out just digs you in deeper and deeper so might as well stop trying. This depression engulfs your whole life and leeches off of every bit of happiness you find. You’re forced to endure. Suffer. I wish I had a solution to tell you. A way out that I could reveal. Alas, no single cure-all like that exists. Each person has their own specific reasons and many times you may not even know what’s causing the depression.

But moving on doesn’t mean that now you’re okay. There is no ‘today’s the day I moved on and I’m happy now’. That just doesn’t happen. When you move on, you don’t ever lose who you were. The sadness follows you. But that’s okay, because when you move on you learn to manage it. You take back control of your life from it. You don’t let it define you anymore. And it grows smaller and smaller. It may never go away entirely, and it’s entirely okay to just sit down and just cry about it every once in a while, but you control it instead of the other way around. That’s the hardest part. Taking back that control. It’s difficult because when you’re in that hole and you’re just waiting for your being to just end, it requires you to get back up and give all of yourself to the task and then some. Motivation that you have to create from nothing. Motivation to do things. To make plans. To get back out there. That motivation is the most difficult thing to find. But it’s like riding a bike up a hill. It’s a tough climb to get to the top, but once you pass the precipice, you just let gravity do the rest. At some point it just starts to become easier and easier, but you’ll never know when until you actually start climbing. You don’t have to start in third gear; you can start in first and do it slow. But you’re the one that has to stay determined. Because if you stop peddling, you’re gonna roll right back down to where you started.

Thats what moving on is. It’s finding the will to take the reigns of your life back into your own hands. Nothing in life is ever just given to you. You have to be the one that goes and takes it. And that applies to happiness as well. You don’t have to forget the past. It’ll always be a part of you. You just have to define your future.

And that’s what’s in my head, thanks for reading! 😀