High school was coming close to an end and for the first time that didn’t seem to bother me. Sure, there were so many things I wanted to accomplish that I wasn’t able to, but just because high school was nearing its finish didn’t mean that my chances to do what I wanted to were also ending. My path to normalcy didn’t have a deadline like I had previously been so worried about. Maybe I’ll never be normal. Who knows? I might end up living the rest of my life as a strange socially awkward person who can’t maintain any normal relationships with another human being, but at least I can continue my days with the knowledge that I can still try to change that. Sam hadn’t appeared in a while and I’m really getting used to the thought of not having her ever show up again. It’s a bit disheartening. I kind of missed her. I didn’t want to miss her and I certainly didn’t want for her come back because I took her hand and she led me to the deepest crevice of my depression, but if it hadn’t been for her I might have led myself there and my story could have had a vastly different ending. It wouldn’t be me telling my story if things had gone differently. For that, I owe her my life. I owe myself my life.
In My Head – Chapter __ (written 05/02/15)